Cheerleadergate claims first victim

Gimme a 3...an 8...and a 7.5!

The University of Idaho cheerleader drama has now been holding the nation hostage for over a week...and it has finally claimed it's first victim (second, if you count 'credibility'). The pleather-clad cheerleading squad's skipper, Cassie Helm, has formally announced her resignation over the affair:

Helm, who teaches aerobics and gymnastics, said she resigned because of the school administrations more conservative vision for the spirit squad.

As you may have heard, John McCain has suspended his presidential campaign and is en route to Moscow to help bring a resolution to this "national crisis". For those not in the know...the Vandal cheerleaders had their racy, Bavarian-style cheerleading unis confiscated last week after an uproar on the Palouse. The cheerleaders took the loss of their uniforms with dignity and grace...

Helm said some cheerleaders told her they cried after a meeting in which the uniforms were confiscated. “Kids aren’t crying if they hate something,” the ex-coach said.

Vandal football players and fans alike joined in sob-fest after losing, badly, to Utah State on Saturday. More fallout and bloodshed are bound to occur in upcoming weeks so brace yourselves because more hissy fits are surely on the horizon. The saddest part of this whole thing?

(cheerleader Heidi) Lyons said the uniform switch deprived the squad its goal to excite the crowd at football games.

You brazen hussies...in my day, "Boom goes the dynamite" was enough to whip the crowd into a frenzy.