10.31.2008

Know your enemy (for this week, anyway)

Trump called...he digs your hair

Boise State heads to Las Cruces on Saturday to take on Hal Mumme and his Air Raid offense. The Broncos are coming off a hard fought win over a legit San Jose State team, the Aggies are coming off a demoralizing loss to the Vandals. Most fans, like me, know little about New Mexico State outside of Polo Gutierrez and his foot-filled mouth. Needless to say, there is a lot to be learned about this week's foe (don't worry, Kellen Moore already knows their defense intimately)...so let's explore through the magic of factoids and childish jokes about Hal Mumme. For the mutual benefit of the Aggie faithful, I will let you get to know us a little bit too...so take notes.

Ten things Bronco fans might not know about New Mexico State

10. NMSU coach Hal Mumme has developed a series of instructional DVDs on the intricacies of the "Air Raid" offense (you can get all 3 for only $109.99). According to Mumme, "the beauty of the Air Raid Offense is that players love to play this offense and fans flock to see it". I apologize to anyone that was mid-sip on their daily beverage. Order now!

9. Hal Mumme is in love with Hawaii. In 2006, he openly stated that Hawaii was the best team in the league (over eventual 13-0 Boise State), voted for June Jones as WAC coach of the year (though Chris Petersen won National Coach of the Year) and last year was the only coach to vote the Warriors number one in USA Today poll. Get a room, you two.

8. The founder and first president of New Mexico State University was Hiram Hadley. Hiram Hadley wished to see "3 principal items" accomplished in his lifetime: National Prohibition, Women's Suffrage and International Peace. Hadley died in 1922, and as such, lived to see two of those 3 items come to fruition. Item number 4, "Never hire Hal Mumme", which was scrawled on a lost piece of parchment, was sadly discovered far too late in 2006.

7. New Mexico State is home to the world's hottest chile pepper. In 2006, NMSU professor Paul Bosland discovered the Bhut Jolokia pepper, which measures at 1,001,304 Scoville Heat Units (SHU). For comparison, an average jalapeƱo pepper measure 10,000 SHU. Last year during the ESPN broadcast of the NMSU/UNR game, annoying sideline reporter extraordinaire Rob Stone decided to give it a little taste test.

6. New Mexico State has never lost a bowl game. Of course, they've only been to three, and none since 1960—but still, no one can away their 1960 Sun Bowl victory over Utah State, their 1959 Sun Bowl victory over North Texas or their 1936 tie with Hardin-Simmons in, you guessed it, the Sun Bowl.

5. The New Mexico State head coach with the best winning percentage was Arthur H. Badenoch, who won 86% of his games between the years of 1910 and 1913 (4 seasons). Badenoch also coached the NMSU basketball team during those years, but had less success—posting only 3 wins and 22 losses.

4. At the Whole Enchilada Fiesta in early October, the city of Las Cruces makes the world's largest enchilada. Afterwards, the city then takes the world's largest Alka Seltzer.

3. The outlaw Billy the Kid resided in Las Cruces for a portion of his short life, as did his killer, lawman Pat Garrett. Popular legend suggests that Garrett killed Billy the Kid by feeding him a portion of the world's largest enchilada and then lighting a match near his residence.

2. Well before the Air Raid sirens went off, New Mexico State actually had a run game. In 1998, running back Denvis Manns rushed for 1,469 yards...still an Aggie record. In fact, Manns was only the 3rd ever NCAA runningback to rush for at least 1,000 yards in four consecutive seasons. Despite Manns' offensive prowess, he never enjoyed a winning season as an Aggie...a feat that Chase Holbrook is sure to match.

1. In 1912, the Aggie football team defeated Fort Bliss, TX 116-0. Apparently, the football team at Fort Bliss were all 4-F.

Ten things Aggie fans might not know about Boise State

10. Hollywood director Michael Hoffman is a Boise State alum and was the school's first Rhodes Scholar. He won two Oscars for the film Restoration, but I think his finest work is the documentary film Out of the Blue, which is about Boise State's undefeated 2006 season...oops, I just spoiled the ending.

9. Cornerback Kyle Wilson's older brother Gerry, a Princeton grad, is the founder and CEO of Yoonew.com, the world's first futures exchange for event tickets. Basically you can guarantee yourself a ticket to the big game if your team makes it. Weird, a search of the term "Idaho Vandals" offers no results on the site.

8. In 1982 Jay Luo received his bachelors in mathematics from Boise State University. No biggie, right? Wrong...he was only 12 years old. When I was 12 I beat Super Mario Bros. 3. I think we all know who made the bigger accomplishment there, am I right?

7. The founder and CEO of Money Tree Payday Loans, Dennis Bassford, is a Boise State alum. Now you know who to punch for unleashing the Money Tree caterpillar upon the world*.

6. Astronaut and "Teacher in Space" Barbara Morgan holds an honorary doctorate from Boise State and is a Distinguished Educator in Residence. Morgan was Christa McAuliffe's backup on the ill-fated Challenger shuttle voyage. While in space, Morgan was able to see the great pyramids, the great wall of China, and the hole in the ozone caused by Hal Mumme's overuse of Aqua Net.

5. One of the most famous moments in NCAA tournament history happened in Boise State's basketball arena (formerly the Pavilion, now Taco Bell Arena) when UCLA's Tyus Edny drove the length of the floor in the closing seconds and nailed a layup to defeat Missouri in 1995. There was a memorable game in the WAC tournament in Las Cruces last year too, but I forget how that one ended.

4. Werner Hoeger, a Boise State professor of excercise physiology competed for his native Venezuela in the 2006 Torino Olympics in the luge event. Hoeger was the flag-bearer for Venezuela and, at 52, was the oldest individual competitor at the games. Hoeger, rather than gracing a Wheaties box, was featured on a box of Centrum Silver.

3. The city of Boise has the largest concentration of Basques outside of the Pyrenees mountains. As such, Boise also has a large concentration of unpronouncable last names.

2. Pokey Allen came to Boise State in 1993 and turned a 3-8 squad into a 13-2 squad playing in the 1-AA national championship. Pokey got sick with cancer soon after and missed almost all of the 1996 season, Boise State's first in Division 1-A. The Broncos were 2-10 that year and Pokey missed the first 10 games while undergoing treatment. He returned and coached the last two games of that year...his last win as Bronco head coach was in Las Cruces against the Aggies. Pokey died a little over a month later.

1. Boise State has been shutout only twice in football, the last coming against Washington State in 1997. Boise State registered two shutouts over their opponents just last year. 20 of Boise State's 24 opponent shutouts since 1968 have occurred at home. Their most lopsided win ever? The first ever game on the blue turf: a 74-0 win over Humboldt State which answered once and for all the question, "can Hippies play football?"

Well, now we know a bit more about each other. Enough fraternizing...let's get ready to RRRUMMBLE!**

* FFBSU does not condone violence...well maybe a little.
** No, Michael Buffer, I don't owe you a cent.

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